dreams of adventure

Closing escrow on a home my hubby and I have enjoyed for twenty-five years, pre-kids until empty nest, we escaped and enjoyed our second home in Tahoe more than I can express in words. But life being what it has been this past five years, some tough decisions had to be made. Followed by some exciting plans for adventure, and a future we can more fully embrace. Translation… a thriving garden, more money in our bank, warmer weather to enjoy, and a project to share. 

I do fear that this is just a bad reaction to being empty nesters, but then I remember 2020 and the government shutting down our very successful business of twenty years, and dealing with the issues of our financial changes during covid. Then the next few summers filled with fire and smoke in the air. So, to summarize, we had good reasons beyond the small town of Tahoe City falling apart around us.

Now here I sit in my friend’s townhouse on the lake, wondering if their boat is about to sink as a storm is brewing and their vessel is topless! Actually, seems a good analogy… whipping around in the gusts of emotions, wondering if my dreams of adventure are destined to sink.

This is the crux, this is sink or swim time, and it is mostly up to me to decide. To not fall prey to my nostalgia at this time, and to save it for calmer waters.

My advice to myself is to plan a fun idea each day, and when I want to breakdown or explode, run it off (as best I can;-) Something to be said for the attacks on your life, year after year, if they don’t kill you, they will do their best to torment… as long as you allow.

This is the time to focus on the gains and the future successes. The time to not allow my feet to get stuck in the muck of memories, they will always be there to return to. I want to taste wide-eyed innocence again, when the morning offers hope of transformation and idealism, not only to hope for more but to appreciate what is. To stay curious in all that I see and feel.

Will report back;-)